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TEACHERS.NET GAZETTE
Volume 3 Number 4

COVER STORY
Harry & Rosemary Wong remind us, "Leaders lead and they lead by caring enough about the success of their teachers that they will roll up their sleeves and model instructional leadership."...
COLUMNS
Effective Teaching by Harry & Rosemary Wong
Promoting Learning by Marv Marshall
4 Blocks by Cheryl Sigmon
Ask the School Psychologist by Beth Bruno
Online Classrooms by Leslie Bowman
The Eclectic Teacher by Ginny Hoover
The Busy Educator's Monthly Five (5 Sites for Busy Educators) by Marjan Glavac
Ask the Literacy Teacher by Leigh Hall
Visual Impairments by Dave Melanson
Instant Ideas for Busy Teachers by Barbara Gruber and Sue Gruber
ARTICLES
Reflecting Upon Read Across America
Earth Day Compilation
The World in Lights
Take a Seat at the Bottom of the Class
Starting Children on Science
Tips for teachers being bullied!
Mr. Choose-A-Chart
Teaching Perseverance Through Adversity-A History Lesson
It's An Early Spring!
Memo to Staff: Our Computer System Crashed-We Have No 'Backups'-You're Not Getting Paid for a Month!
Keep Your Online Community Alive!
Curricular Science the 'Curry' way!
Geography Awareness
Principal of the Year Ray Mellberg
eBook Technology
Respect Means...
Creative Uses for Digital Cameras in the Classroom
Teaching Gayle to Read (Part 4)
Young Lawyers Ementoring Magnet Students
The Welcome Mat of a High School On-Line Community
Plato Lives...
The Asphalt Classroom
26 Teaching Tips for the Dog Days
Using Storytelling in the Classroom
Recapturing the Courage to Teach
To Leave No Child Behind
TEACHER INSPIRATION
If you say you CAN'T, it means you WON'T
Something Nice a Student Did Yesterday...
ON-SITE INSIGHTS
When Your Child Comes Home Messy
Praise vs. Encouragement
People Don't Play...
REGULAR FEATURES
Apple Seeds
Special Days This Month
Poem - Song of a Second April
The Lighter Side of Teaching
  • YENDOR'S Top Ten
  • Culprit Management
  • Schoolies
  • Woodhead
  • Handy Teacher Recipes
    Classroom Crafts
    Help Wanted - Teaching Jobs
    "Why Do We Have Night" from the Lesson Bank
    Upcoming Ed Conferences
    Letters to the Editor
    FYI
    The School Web Page: A Vehicle for Innovation
    Eighth Emerson Prizes Awarded in Boston
    Student Nanoexperiments Will Help Future Astronauts on Mars
    The 11th Annual National Institute for Early Childhood Professional
    International Conference on Computers in Education
    SESSIONS ANNOUNCED: Congress in the Classroom 2002
    Teacher Network United States Mint
    DEADLINE: Civic Education Grants
    Gazette Home Delivery:


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    © John P. Wood for
    Learning Laffs  

    Culprit Management
    by Goose/TX (
    goose@teachers.net)

    I have a student in my class who continually causes problems. He leaves trash on the floor and in the desk and never puts his science equipment away at the end of class. When I'm attempting to talk to my class, this student interrupts me. When the class is supposed to be working on an activity, and somebody is up running around or not doing his work, it's always the same student. If somebody is throwing paper or something else, it's always that student.

    Last week, somebody had been playing with some springs which I had stored in a cabinet, and he left one on the floor and one in the desk. After asking the class who was responsible for this misbehavior, I discovered that it was the same student who is always causing problems in my class.

    Recently, one of our students sabotaged the sinks in one of our restrooms along with writing on one of the stalls. When I asked the students if they knew who the culprit was, they told me the same name as the person who had caused so many problems in my class.

    Even in the cafeteria this same person was throwing food and leaving trash where he had been eating. When asked who had left the mess on the table, the students all replied with the same name of the person who had been causing all of the other problems in our school. Also, when problems occurred on the busses on the way to or from school, and the students were asked who had caused the problems, again it was that same person.

    Finally, last Wednesday I had enough of this student's delinquent antics and assigned him four days of detention including Saturday. I didn't have any free time to take the detention slip to the office myself, and therefore asked a dependable sixth grade student to take the detention slip to the office for me. I also asked the student to inform the secretary that I would not tolerate that student in my class any longer.

    I realize that this was a considerably serious task to ask a sixth grade girl to accomplish for me and would have preferred to carry it out myself, but I couldn't leave my class for fear that that same person would cause problems. I can imagine the conversation that would have ensued had I been able to deliver the message.

    "This student has continually caused disruptions in my class. He constantly misbehaves, and I do not intend to tolerate his misbehavior any longer!"

    "What grade is this student in?"

    "The sixth grade and the eighth grade."

    "How can a student be in both the sixth grade and the eighth grade?"

    "I don't know. I suppose that the computer miraculously created one of its infamous schedules."

    "What are you talking about?"

    "I'm talking about every time we receive a new student, the computer assigns that student to my largest class. Why can't the computer assign the new student to one of my smaller classes?"

    "It's a scheduling problem."

    "Well, there you go, a scheduling problem has caused this student to be in both my sixth grade and my eighth grade classes. By the way, who's responsible for my having a class of ten students and then a class of twenty-one students?"

    "Not me!"

    " Well, there you go, he's even messed up our scheduling!"

    "Who are you talking about?"

    "Not Me, who is the same student who has wreaked havoc all over our school! I'm assigning Not Me to four days of detention and then kicking him out of my class!"


    Top Ten Reasons I Am Late Getting in This Month's Top Ten
    by YENDOR (
    yendor@teachers.net)


    10. He who gets more off lunch line.
     9.

    Been busy hiring a hitman for RandyAk for all his posts about me.

     8.

    Been selling Bob Reap's cd on E Bay.

     7.

    Been reading all the posts and trying to figure out if I came from a monkey or if God made me. So far, leaning toward God.

     6.

    Still waiting for part two of Thelma and Louise.

     5.

    Given up on figuring out Ginger or Mary Anne...now trying to figure out... Gilligan or Skipper!

     4.

    Hired a detective to find out who my Secret Pal is.

     3.

    Working on a second career as a sugar daddy.

     2.

    Supercharged Accelerated Reader and one of my kids tested on 350 books in one day and blewn out the computer system.

     

    1.

     

    Been in Hooked on Phonics rehab program.



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    Learning Laffs  

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